remember that one time i came up with something good? I can't remember what it was.

Creating happiness is just a more self-confident version of finding happiness. 











Pranav forced me to post this

Things die

I wonder how long it takes a living note to die. Is there a certain day when a living note is no longer living but is then dead? Maybe it follows a sort of exponential decay pattern. Because after something is mostly dead it's still alive kind of. Do dead notes come back to life?

Morning Pages: The Butterfly

Just like a butterfly that fluttered into my window, is how you came. It is hard to notice anything but your fragile wings, and the translucent glittering colors in sunlight. I try my hardest not to scare you away, but you can't afford to be caught. If you had just stayed a moment longer, just long enough for my memory to sketch out... Well. What would I do? Share it or keep it greedily to myself? I suspect your secrets might be better off with someone else. So it's better that you left, went back to dance in the flowering meadows as a butterfly should.

Luna is best princess

I wonder if My Little Pony captured the essence of the sun being a constant force and the moon being a dynamic slightly broken being by accident or if they had it all figured out before I even got to it.

When you realize you don't have rights to own a picture of your own face

You know how in school, every time they take your photo for the yearbook they send you this sample photo? I was practicing violin and getting distracted and I saw it laying in a corner of the room. You know how it has this watermark that says "copyright protected, DO NOT COPY?" I mean, why does this random company have a copyrighted photo of my face? What are they even going to do with it? I would think that I would have the right to decide whether my face is public domain or not, but nope, I can't copy this photo of myself because COPYRIGHT LAW. Instead I have to buy the photo, and even then, are they selling me the right, or the physical photo? If I buy the photo, am I allowed to make copies of it then? Or does the copyright still belong to "mylifetouch" photography? I don't remember agreeing to this. They still make us get our photo taken. Was this some sort of agreement my parents made for me when I was young? Like what? Now that I'm older can I technically go and refuse to get my photo taken? Now that I think of it, there are probably lots of copyrighted photos of people everywhere. I suppose newspapers and magazines have lots of copyrighted photos of people, and the people in them have no claim to them. We sign away rights to our own image. Actually sometimes we pay someone to take that right away from us. And then I think about the fact that, someone really famous could probably sell rights to take pictures of them, if they really wanted. Because profit! All people want is profit. Do people do that? This whole post might be completely bs because I don't actually know how these things work.

The difference

The sun is really really really really really really beautiful. But you can't look at her directly, because she'll blind you. The sun is dependable. She never goes away. She always shines. I imagine she's the image of perfection. If the sun was a person, she'd be the definition of moral correctness, justice. She'd be the type of person you can always depend on. She is perfect. She is beyond your comprehension. She's so good that she feels foreign and unrelatable. Emotionally, she is content, always.

The moon is also beautiful but you can look at her because her light won't blind you. She's dynamic and she changes. She goes through phases. She has happy times and sad times. She's kind of human just like us. She is a little bit broken just like all of us are. But that is what makes her beautiful. She's relatable. If she was a person she'd be a good person, but with flaws. Not like the sun.

Art as proof that our lives up until this point were not wasted

-we make art and keep records and do science as proof that we were here
-we were here, not only for others to see but to prove to ourselves what we once were
-we make art so that we don't look back at our pasts and think, what the heck was i even doing...
-because i do not know my past self as well as i know my present self because i forgot
-and without a record how do i even know that i was even a person that had complex thoughts and feelings?
-i can remember things about what i did, but i remember very little of what i thought or felt with exceptions
-the best i can do is read what i wrote and look at what i drew which are the only remnants of the intelligence i used to be